Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Reasons why you are reading this

I´m sorry I interrupted your busy day. Since I started putting comments in newspapers webs to bring people here I´m finding out a lot of things. A lot of people follow stupid comments, and even more worrying: A lot of people read the comments in the newspapers webs. Really? I have a sad existence, but dude, go to the comments, read them, follow them, reply them and even get involve in discussions? That´s sad (Yeah, sure, they should write a lame blog nobody reads or likes and spend 30 minutes per day putting spams, that is not sad)

At this point I should explain what is this blog about. We have 4 types of posts:

Ways/ This type talks about ways of doing things and ways of dealing with miseries and weird situations. For example, one is about how to say No to going to a mass.

Things/ This kind is the worst, it talks about different things that I like, hate or whatever the drugs make me write.

Reasons/ Well, you are in one of those right now. I explain things I do or witness, I don´t know why yet.

Reactions/ I use these ones to redeem myself of stupid reactions to stupid situations that I usually live. I´m awful at reactions.

Then we also have some entries of such thing as an Alter Ego. Some dude sends me entries sometimes, I find that interesting, funny and worrying, so I add some tips inside brackets and then post them.

And that is pretty much it. I am not selling you anything, I´m just giving you the oportunity of choosing. I have shown you the existence of this blog, now you choose if you stay or leave. And yes, I write like a retarded, that is why I´m a retarded and from Spain. So yes, you have been reading something written by a fucking Spaniard. I´m sorry for you, but relax, is not completly your fault, your life may be good after all. These are the reasons why you are reading this:

1/ You are a kind person who spends his time reading blogs all over the internet because you think real writers are overrated. You like to help and impruve the skills of new anonymous writers by leaving instructive comments on their posts (You need to get a life sucker)

2/ You are learning English and you are basically reading everything you find in this language (Keep searching then)

3/ You were just reading the news in the NY post and for some reason you went down to the comments, you followed one and ended up here reading this (You have to stop following random comments dude, look at you now. How could you get over this awful experience?)

4/ You are my mom (Hi mom, How are you?)

5/ You always go wherever the comments in the news send you (If I did that I would be surrounded by feeces)

6/ You are one of my ex-girlfriends tracking me out in the internet (Wow, you must be really ugly then)

7/You are a crazy human being full of hate and you like going through people blogs and leave agressive comments to feel better (I guess there is two of us now, I love that shit)

8/ You are in prison and the gardian punished you (My humble advice: Go back to the showers)

9/ You are a completly idiot who doesn´t have very much to do with his life (You should write a blog)

10/ You are a cop investigating me for pederast after someone told you about the things I say in this blog (I swear he seemed to like it)


  1. Anonymous8/9/10

    You forgot a very boring evening, but it's ok.. Soooo.... Guilty for no. 7, sometimes for no. 9 and for no. 2

  2. Anonymous10/9/10

    I hate this blog, yet can't stop reading it...

  3. Anonymous2/2/12

    You forgot a reason (the most important I think):

    You love me.