Things I don´t get

I’m weird, that’s pretty clear if you read my stories. But I’m a weird guy who likes rational things, and sadly I’m always witnessing irrational behaviours in people who disrespect weird people. They go around thinking they are normal, they are okay, that the people who don’t act like them are crazy. But then they do things such as the ones I’m going to share with you. These are some things I don’t get:

1/ They are very normal, very logic. I’m the crazy guy because I opened an umbrella inside my house. Of course the normal thing to do is get really mad at me and worry a lot because it gives a lot of bad luck (I don’t know if this happens in other countries, and I don’t know either if anybody else thinks opening an umbrella inside a house is really funny too)

2/ I was just a little boy, seven years old I guess. I was about to play the final of a soccer cup in my home town. When we entered in the field they had the cup over a table in there waiting, I saw it and thought it would be nice touching it a little bit because you know, it was lying in there, but that was a crazy thing to do. The normal thing to do was telling off a seven year old for touching a cup because it gives very bad luck (We won and I played pretty bad, that means touching the cup gave me good luck, I usually played really awful. In the celebration I fell down and got myself a black-eyed though)

3/ I’m odd because I like talking about UFOs, ghosts, CIA conspiracy or wolf men, that’s the crazy thing to do. Normal sane people don’t just like talking about some guy two thousands years ago healing blinds, dying and reviving, going to the heaven, that’s a place where human beings who died go to hang out forever, they even believe it (Who needs help here?)

4/ I’m nuts because after spending a few years of my life going out every night and end up a little unbalanced because of drugs I decided to stop that for writing stories and travelling around. When everybody knows the normal thing to do is keep going out every night to still being a cool guy (Junkies street cleaners are the coolest guys according to them)

5/ I’m insane because I run away of serious relationships with women I don’t really like or love and vice versa. When everybody knows the normal and logic thing to do is getting involved in a relationship with the first person you can tolerate just to not being alone (That’s probably the reason why I’m so unhappy when all the couples are so happy)

6/ I’m unstable because I like to get in a train and go wherever it takes me, because when I travel to a city I’ve never been I don’t buy a guide of the place and go around seeing the most famous monuments, churches and museums. I just walk around, grab some beers and talk with the natives, and that is crazy. The normal thing to do when you travel is preparing the trip for a whole year and then going to every single place in the city’s guide and just relate with the tourist guides and other tourists for a week (I’ve been in the city and I missed the Rockefeller centre. I must commit suicide!)

7/ I’m bizarre because I started writing a blog where I talk about some experiences I had and other nonsense. When the rational thing to do is writing a blog talking about your children, cats or both. Or reading blogs that talk about nonsense or about the writer’s cat and children (Do you know any shrink please?)

8/ I’m crazy because I don’t have Twitter, Facebook, Myspace and those things. I need help because I’m not interested on using them when the logic thing to do is writing your personal daily experiences in the web under your whole personal information to share it with your friends and a bunch of people you don’t know and you probably won’t (Is so enriching get to talk with those ex-girlfriends, friends, class mates, teachers, unknowns… Why am I wasting my life like this?)

9/ I’m definitive mad because I through away my self phone two years ago, I’m living in 2010 and I don’t have a mobile anymore! I’m missing so much those daily conversations with people I don’t want to talk to, those messages saying nothing, that fucking vibration in my pocket, those inappropriate interruptions when I was doing something I liked, that habit of checking every minute if someone had called, those girls that took my phone behind my back and just doing that got to know how phony I was with them (I need my life back!)

10/ I’m at a mental hospital’s doors because I’ve never used a watch. I go along with my live without a watch! Oh my Gosh! When I want to know the time I have to approach another human being and asking him the time. Why me Lord? Why me? Of course the normal thing to do is spending half of your salary on a Rolex even though you probably don’t even know how to read the clock’s hands (Don’t wear a watch is crazy too because in the streets, cars or buildings it’s impossible to find something that tells you the time, that is some difficult information to get)